kidding, kids and kidneys

JonJon Johnson and his gnaw-wegian friend, Gnawman, decided to ignaw their promise to JonJon’s father, Doctor Jonathan Johnson, not to enter the laboratory in the gnawth wing of the egnawmous old house where the Johnsons lived. The laboratory was where Doctor Johnson, disregarding the gnawms of his profession, performed ugnawthodox experiments to find ways to help JonJon’s sister Gnawma, repair

scapegoat

His name was Godfrey. His friends called him "Goat". He had busted out of prison a few days earlier. Since his escape Goat had been on the lamb, coppers dogging his every move. It was driving him batty. He yearned for a gnawmal life, but he'd never toad the line for long enough to settle down. It was raining heavily as he made his way to where his girlfriend Gwyneth and her sister Anna lived.

the map-colourer and the travelling salesman

The map-colourer's new client wanted a map in which the same colour was not to be used for any two adjacent regions sharing a common border. The map colourer's problem was that he only had four colours, and he didn't want to start colouring in and then find he needed more colours to satisfy the client's request. So he called the travelling salesman who was the only source of coloured pencils in

meaningslaughter

Seventeen spin cycles ago, the August Facility of Horse-Mongerers Generale convened an Erstwhile Redolence, ostensibly to honor Pederast and zer military facilitations. Naturally, nobody expected Pederast to instantiate specifically, explicitly or otherwise---notwithstanding ministrations of dubious provenance to the contrary. Of course, it goes without saying, but not without writing, that the

the secrets of Pappiloma

Held within the human heart or mind, are dark secrets, darker secrets and the darkest secrets of all--those relating to shame and guilt. No more or less shameworthy than those held within the heart of Pappiloma, a Senior Scribe in the Royal Department of Information of the Royal Bureau of Administrivia of the Realm of the Right Royal Regime of King Roger the 14th, the reigning ruler of Rogerland-